I believe in yesterday.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Alvie: "Honestly, I'm curious to know if my dear jia min has ever given her heart away?"

PS: Inception was truly awesome. (:
Xoxo.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me

'Because love was never RIGHT to begin with, we are always LEFT with nothing.'

I scraped through everything.
(They moderated econs by 9marks! So I scraped a D (shockingly) which placed me in the 80something-th percentile -.- wth.)
Math is worse, with 595/900++ Us in the cohort (You should have been there to hear the cheering... :/)
And even though the P talk was boring, I got my wake up call. My grades aren't great. They're just mediocre. D: My percentiles aren't up to my standard and I even got below the 50th percentile for Bio. D: I need to startput in the man-hours in my academics.
I'm gonna start my studdy buddies plus night studies next week, I promise. :D Bit the bullet, and move forward.
Anyway, I finally got the signature for my report slip.
Let's move on.

GP Essay test and Vectors test tomorrow. Consecutively. Awesome. -.-

Anyway, happy birthday Ally! I love you loads and loads for everything- from you bubbly persona to your cheery aura. Thanks for being such a great example in my life. :D

And I don't want to be left with nothing.
Xoxo.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

I cried a river for you

Today was pretty alright.

Bio Mock SPA was pretty easy - quite a couple of regurgitation questions apart from the experiment. (I really miss doing food test last year though... D:)
Lunched with Oli (The laksa was not too bad, though Mummeh Oli was practically feeding her uniform with the gravy, haha!) after school. Zee came over after her lesson and we were doing tutorials when Zee suddenly asked me to accompany her to get her Vitamin C tablets outside school (for SRP) so I did, (And I got Marie Low's carnation too - the daisies were too ugly, heehee!) Came back, did a lil' more of Chem Equilibria tutorial before Gabz came over (from his supposed Econs 'fieldtrip' which was at the playground outside school in search for market failure! Lol Mrs R. is such a cute teacher, hahaha!) And he said how there were little kids playing at the playground and when Mrs R. told the kids. "Okay I'm gonna conduct a lesson here, if you want, you can stay." All the kids ran away! Haha! :P Oli and Zee left for Lit supp and SRP resepectively, while Gabz and I went to the round benches (and up to the choir room later) and chatted about almost everything till 3.30pm when I had to go for choir. Thanks Gabz, I really miss having a close friend like you to talk to, haha :D And please please study hard okay; don't even think of U-turning now. Choir was alright, sectionals followed by mass alto voice training (my voice's feels like it's stuck in my throat today :/) and i need to cure my dark sound, still. Sigh I guess it's been a problem that I've had to work on for ages, but I guess it's not too late to try to make myself sound brighter. And somehow my range seemed to have shrunk a little. I need to train! :D

Well, enough of the happy stuff for now.
I guess one main problem that's been weighing on my mind was MYE results. True, I felt decently happy with it, honestly (And I think I'll pass everything on my record.) but from the conversation with the parentals on sunday, I could tell they weren't too happy about it...
So tell me, what should I do?
Or how should I feel?
What am I supposed to do to make you guys happy?
Straight A's for promos? (at the expense of my happiness level? The straight A's won't come anyway - not for promos, at the very least.)
I think I'll start celebrating if I attained straight Cs.
Sigh.

It's painfully difficult to please the parentals. :(

Okay, I'm making a move first.
Goodnight world.

Xoxo.

Monday, July 26, 2010

(During Bio Lecture this morning...)
Mrs Tan: During photosynthesis, light energy is converted to...
Student: Dark energy?

o.O

Saturday, July 24, 2010

When we sway I go weak

Productive study date with Valchew at Singpost today - completed the draft for dii's Econ's essay, understanding half of Respiration's notes, started on Vectors 6c (though I got stuck halfway D:) and did a lil' Chem Reaction Kinetics from the freaking-expensive-yellow-chem book.

And I finally bought a new hair straightener (finally!) after ages! (I don't know I think the last one died D:) So now I can happily straighten my bangs and I won't get laughed (esp by the boys, seriously. :/)

So I came home, chatted on MSN, printed lecture notes for next week and serenaded myself with Michael Buble's gorgeous voice. (I'm sorry to the other guys out there, don't be jealous okay! :P)

Test(s) week starts this week - Bio Mock SPA on wednesday followed by the consecutive GP and Vector's CTs on friday.
And my dreaded Parents-CT conferencing on friday evening. (And I still don't know the reason why my parents want to see him. D:)

National Day Hols please come soon! I love the idea of meeting awesome people on consecutive days and having a good rest. :D
But after National Day Hols come...
Okay let's stop here for now.

Toodles people! :D
Xoxo

Friday, July 23, 2010

Running through the monsoon

SALLYGOHSHIYUN,
I know it's been a really long and sad day for you, and the past few weeks must have really been terrible for you...
But hang in there my dear girl, don't give up hope whatsoever and I'll be here for you no matter what the outcome will be between the both of you. Cry it out, I'll be here to offer my shoulder of support, tissue, sweets like how we did it just now while completing our econs assignment during my 5hours break between bio lecture and choir prac. :D
All I can tell you is, if it's genuinely because of that, then I can completely assure you it is NOT your fault. So don't take it too hard on yourself, don't give in just like this alright!
We can look back a couple of months later and laugh at our silly reasons for "emo"ing on alternate days.
Be strong and cheery like you've always been,
And you know I'll always be here for you.
Loveyougirl.
Xoxo.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Feelings are tumbling over feelings

It's complicated.
And now I'm confused.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Trouble is a friend

I tell you what is painful.

Painful is when you are unintentionally being reminded of someone, the things that happened and knowing that your friendship will never be the same again.

Painful is also when your parents are persistant about going to school to meet you CT even though THEY DON'T HAVE TO. D:

I hate how my day ends today. :(
I'll just shorten my pain tonight.

Monday, July 19, 2010

As I surrender unto sleep

I passed H2 Bio. On the dot. 45/100! *Jumps around like some insane monkey for joy*
I hope my rank points will be decent this time round? :P

I can finally sleep in peace tonight. :D
My awaited sleep, here I come.

PS: I met Mrs R. this morning who told me there's moderation for econs so... I may get to pass econs after all? :D
(But okay even if I don't, I'm alright with it, LOL.)

Okay nonsensical post here, but whatever.
Toodles! :D
Xoxo.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

What doesn't kill does makes you stronger

Tomorrow marks the beginning of a new chapter for Jace.

I really hope you'll shine in NAFA with your potential designs. Work hard and have fun, my dear boy. :D

The new chapter of my life started when I came back from Olomouc, and I'm pretty confident in saying I've been generally quite happy for the last month - mugging for MYE with study buddies, MYE, post-MYE celebrations with TJ-girls followed by a couple of outings, PW week (you could say I was almost as free as a bird, esp. wed which was a waste of time because I start sch at 7.30am for assembly and end at 9am, so I only went to school for an hour's worth of GP, haha.), couple of outings here and there - (shopping, bowling, pooling, lunches and dinners, caught toy story 3 and eclipse, jogging/walking 8km with Sab at ECP, loads of H2H-talks, etc.), relatively satisfactory MYE results (thus far - I can't complain since I've not gotten a single U YET. And I passed the 2H2 criteria set by the exam board by the school this time so my parents aren't invited to NY to have a cuppa' coffee and chat session with my CT(Y)! Actually I'm only left with H2 Bio to worry if the U will ever come. But I S-d H1 Econs! D: I was feeling so sad about it until I met some of the 02 people who were wondering why I looked terribly glum and when I told them I failed, Val said they counted everyone's marks (I think) and Peiyu & I tied at 23 marks, being the highest 2 for econs AND WE FAILED anyway! Beautifully ironic. So tell me how am I supposed to feel - sad because I failed econs or happy because I topped the class? :/), steppingdown as the SC in choir, my first choir prac in a year as a member, institute lesson with Bro Raymond Pun, study dates with a couple of people, dinner with Gabz Oli Nabi Jae and Rach on friday night at J8 & dress-hunting with Malia for her intern company's dinner&dance (the dress was glitzy golden-brown colour. Totally suits her (Y)!)

Last Tuesday marked the beginning of my mundane and routined life.
But really, it wasn't too bad.
I know I can do this.
I know I can. C:

(And guess what, I went for GP consultation on friday! ...Yeah I know, hold your laughter in front of me. But it was alright, actually. Haha!) :P

Xoxo.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

The people who made my JC life worth living

I miss my batchmates.
I miss my choirexco truckloads.
I know my choir life will never be quite the same without them.
But I know I still have to carry on.

I'll miss Rachel using her hand sanitizer like there's no tomorrow and her OCD.
I'll miss Simon for being having an ego bigger than the universe and being one of the most competent leaders I've met so far.
I'll miss calling Carl toilet paper and paying him $5.50 in coins of denominations of $0.50 or less.
I'll miss constantly bickering/disagreeing with Yan Jun though there's usually no conclusions to our arguements and how he's able to tell when I'm sad.
I'll miss sitting with Olivia, ranting to her my problems and how she'll always reply me "You never know. *smiley face*"
I'll miss Hansi being the Mr Nice-guy and how he wasn't that annoyed when Charm and I weren't very productive during night studies last year and talked more than we should.
I'll miss Jin Yang for constantly buying sandwiches during SYF period last year and containers after containers of tauhuays for us before choir.
I'll miss Gabriel Chew for being the ultimate school clown, being this mad chinaman speaking in Canto(which I'm totally clueless in) and attempting to be cheapo by eating porridge and remove the peanuts at Ding Tai Fung and being one of the closest opposite gender friends I've had in years and someone I can tell stuff and talk about anything under the sky to.
I'll miss Monica for piling up the plates at Sakae Sushi last year (we should totally do it again hahahaha!) and for constantly being so supportive and encouraging!
I'll miss using Kerlene's phone to demand a ransom from YL during OP period last year and for being the cutest person to hug!
I'll miss Nabillah for being part of the alto sisters, taking trains with her while she starts ranting on everything!
I'll miss mugging with Charmaine and sitting by breakwaters at ECP drowning our sorrows and being the other of my alto sisters!
I'll miss Zhuo Hong for exuding this big, brotherly feeling to us, and his reactions that never fails to make us laugh. Like the Jason letter on his birthday!
I'll miss Si Hao for being the SL that amazed me the most because of his no-musical/choral background prior to NYJChoir and being like the other big brother in this little family of ours.

Thank you for making my JC life so memorable and bearable.
Thank you for being there for me (especially at the moments of despair).
Thank you for bringing out the best in me.
And thank you for being a part of my life.
I love you guys,
Xoxo.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Cos tonight's gonna be a good good night

Today feels awesome.
Wayyyy awesome.
Knowing that I've cleared at least 2H2s & 1H1 pass, (at the very least - Bio & Econs not out yet, though I'm not too optimistic about those two,) Not very awesome results, but enough to make me feel good that i passed promo criteria during mids. I should treat myself, seriously. :D
I quote TT's "NAHHHHHHHHH!" IN YOUR FACE! :D
Free Magnum Ice-cream day too! (Courtesy of NYJC, :D)

The only downside today is that I start school at 7.30 and end at 5. It's longer than the majority's 9-5 working hours.
But today feels worth it.

I feel good.
And I haven't felt like this in ages.
Thank you for guiding me throughout this period of tough time, dear Lord. :D
And for awesome teachers and friends who helped me through, be it mugging dates, encouragements, consultations, etc. :D

I hope this feeling lasts for awhile.
And may I be motivated to push myself even harder. :D
For now, I should work harder and dream new dreams.

And get study buddies, again. :D
Xoxo.

PS: The brother finally started orientation at NAFA after a good 9 months of holidays. Jiayou my dear boy. :D
PPS: I hope I don't get insonmia tonight. (:

Sunday, July 11, 2010

All I wanna do is find a way back into love

MY NEW TIMETABLE SUCKS. D:
I START AT 7.30AM ON TUESDAYS AND END AT 5PM.
I END BETWEEN 12.30PM-1.30PM ON WEDNESDAYS AND FRIDAYS BUT I'VE GOT CHOIR WHICH DON'T START TILL x HOURS LATER, WHERE x IS A VALUE BETWEEN 2-5.
BAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :(
(And all Salted Pig did was just laugh at me. Awesome job. D:)

Piano playing this morning was alright, thank goodness :D
I really wish I could spend a lil' more time tinkling on the piano... and singing too.
After A's, after A's.

And half day off tomorrow thanks to the (awesome) World Cup match tomorrow morning! :D
(If I didn't have to go back for Chem Lecture tomorrow, I wouldn't have school. Tsk. D:)
But alright, count my blessings for not having to wake up at 6am tomorrow, heehee. :D

Anyway, to the J2s out there, hang in there alright. I can't experience your pain now since I'm not going through them yet, but if you're feeling worn out, tangled up, depressed and what not and you need someone to talk to, just pick up your phone and call/sms me. Or MSN. Let go of the pressure. I feel terrible seeing you guys look so stressed; and I don't want it to come to a point where I won't be able to hand you a stressball even if I wanted to. Just an analogy, but you get the point.

J1s are stressy over WR right now, but I'm telling you, hang in there people! You will make it through. (It's really a whole load easier saying this when my time's over, but it'll really be over soon!) I can try to help. (in whatever way I hope possible, I guess :D EXCEPT asking me to do your entire WR, heehee.)

Went bowling, pooling and dinner with Rach, Gabz, Yan Jun, JY, Zhuo, Carl and Gabcheow on Friday (Many girls caught the fever bug post mids pronto, please take care of yourselves okay) and it was tons of fun. Okay, our bowling sucks ttm - I'll quote Yan Jun/Carl: "Our 5th & 6th round equate to the next team's 2nd & 3rd round." The reason why we're all in choir instead of bowling huh, :P And I finally got to learn how to play pool and somewhat got the hang of it!(Credits to Master Gabcheow, thank you shifu!) Hahaha doubles between Gabcheow and I & Zhuo/Gabz and Rach. I really wanna play pool again soon! :D Dinner at Just Acia so that the boys can fill their tummies with free flow of icecream and drinks (Hahaha I'm kidding, but yeah) and chatting and gossips and whatnot, and seeking advice from the 2 Gabs was fun, before Rach dragged me to look for 2 bags as birthday gifts for her friends while the boys loitered at FOX (Of all places why there?!) and most of em' left before she was done except JY who accompanied me to wait for her till she was done before she cabbed home while JY and I trained home (thanks for accompanying me to Paya Lebar, :D) Awesome day, but the next time we need full attendance thankyouverymuch. :D Lazy to upload photos, another day perhaps. (But like Yan Jun said, most of the photos inside are of the guys bowling because Rach kept snapping them, esp. Gabcheow - she was trying to take the most unglamourous candid shot of him for reasons unknown to me, haha!)

Woah that paragraph above must have been realllllllll crazy to read. :P

Anyway, HAPPY SWEET 16th DAWNNANGSHIWEN. You're a wonderful big girl right now, I've seen you change so much over the years, for the better that is - stay pretty, pure in heart and may you have a great time celebrating this special day with your family and basking in loads of love today. All the best for the big O's and in everything you do. Love you girl! :D

16th was such a special age. I miss being 16. Talk about being younger...

Alright, dinner now. :D
Till then.
Xoxo.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Stay with me

Was looking through some of the pictures on fb and I chanced upon this.
ZH's i-ate-too-much-and-wanna-puke-face, my yay-i've-got-two-fries-face and Gabz's i'm-eating-the-oh-too-salty-fries-until-so-sian-face = HILARIOUS (Our expression, that is. :D)

4days till we officially step down. I'm gonna miss exco a wholeload. D:

Intense moodswing for the past week, (according to Bren and I can't deny it,) talked to Bren, Oli, Gabz & JY about it and I actually feel a tonload better now, thanks guys. :D

And the most important reason why I'm blogging today is because I wanna say, HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY EC! You're legal! :D Thank you for being one of the bestest closest true girlfriend I can ever, ever have who never gave up on me, for being someone who can get lose sleep over me, talk to me in the wee hours of the morning at the time when I went into post-promo-trauma-depresion, Thank you for walking into my life when others were walking out. Thank you, for being a significant part of my life. I hoped you enjoyed your day and we'll celebrate it belated. :D Love you loads girlfriend. :D

I better get some sleep, gotta play the piano in church tomorrow and I can't afford to play wrongly, I guess.

Goodnight lovelies. :D
Xoxo.

Tuesday, July 06, 2010

I'm not that girl

I think it wouldn't hurt if I acted a little dumb at times.
(:

Xoxo.

Monday, July 05, 2010

You make me smile like the sun

One day, I'll look back at my bangs days and laugh at myself.

Thanks for making me smile when I'm sad, gfs. :)
Xoxo.

Please forgive me,

There was a particular incident (I will not disclose details so that you guys can't find out who the person is) that kept haunting me for the past few days though it happened slightly more than half a year ago. I can't believe I was so blinded to the point that the feelings of a particular someone was so freaking obvious and it only dawned on me so, so, so long later.

Initially I felt that that afternoon went a little too weird for me but I never really dared to wonder why (partly because I guess I was a little too scared to think of what that someone's actions would have implied), but as I took a step back, confided in a couple of close girlfriends (all of them came to the same conclusion as I recounted the entire afternoon) and recollection from other little memories we had, I've come to a realisation that I'm really, really slow when it comes to myself even though others could see your intentions so clearly.

"You look so different from every other photo I've seen of you
on FB!" "Since they've already saw the both of us, let's pretend that we're
together?" "If you really don't want to go with them, I'll be a gentleman and
accompany you to lunch." "I treat you to lunch?" "Why no?" "Why won't you let me
reciprocate your kindness?" "Okay I shall get (this) for you." "Hey, where are
you heading for after this? Wanna accompany me to (place)?" "Okay let's walk
down to (place) from here, I can be the tourguide!" "Haha do you wanna walk down
to (the location I'm heading for)? I know a shortcut..."
"Take train? Oh okay..." "If my friend doesn't reply in (2 or 4mins) I'll alight
at (my station) and walk over to my friend's place (which is at least one
station away)." ...
I don't know if you ever read my blog, or will ever read this post,
but if you do, I just want to say,
I'm sorry. I really am.
For the way I reacted to some of your questions and comments. It must have hurt when I said NO to that and many of the subsequent questions you asked because I felt a little too overly uneasy after that question. I'm sure I must have given the "Please don't ever talk to me, ever." signal when you left even though you were trying hard to make me happy throughout the entire afternoon which made me all the more guilty right now.

Well, it's been half a year. I hope you'll forget the pain I've subconsciously inflicted on you that very afternoon (and beyond) and I hope to believe that you have moved on...
I don't want our friendship to turn sour after that afternoon because our post conversations were never the same again after that day and I hate it and we haven't talked in a long, long time.

I'm sorry for the wrong impressions I may have possibly given to you to make it seem like the feeling between us was mutual.
Even though I've never had those feelings for you,
Please forgive me.

And dear memory, please stop haunting me with that incident. I really need my sleep. It's 1.30am in the morning and I'm supposed to meet Sab at 7.30am.
Goodnight people.
-Case closed-

Friday, July 02, 2010

Let's fly down to Peru

TCC (I had iced chocolate, seriously weird imo but that's like one of the very few things I can consume there, LOL) followed by dinner with EC and Jes. We were planning to sit by Singapore River at Clarke Quay to chat and enjoy the scenic view but the *urgh* downpour ruined the plan so we ended up indoors. :( (Sorry Jes, we'll go to Clarke Quay again one day alright, promise! :D) EC was basically 'reporting' to Jes about our lives (Hahaha I know it sounds so examishy, but I'm just quoting from EC LOL!) while we were laughing at our stupid embarassing moments (Okay I agree it's more of me being embarassed and laughing at myself, but what's new?) And EC was commenting how my figure suddenly looked so flattering on stage, esp at the finale scene where we did the finale dance and I was donned in that black dress I didn't really wanna wear cos I was so scared I would zao geng, but thankgoodness nothing happened :D I guessed everything was so amusing, and I really enjoyed the great company with the two girls. :D

EC's turning legal next week, fyi. Yay! :P

Xoxo.

At times like this you wondered

My mids are over! (But zee said I acted like promos were over, haha!) I think I deserve a good rest for a couple of days. :D

Met my TJ girls S, S, E at PP for dinner today, was planning to go to ECP but it was dark by then so we just strolled around PP instead. (PS: shopping in uniform is very inconvenient, seriously D:) But it's okay, I'm meeting them again on saturday for proper shopping trip yay! (: Love my girls(:

Convo with Zhengyuan on MSN followed by smses (cos her mum wanted her to sleep so she had to turn off the com, haha!) and she made me realise how long I haven't met her in more than a year, in 15months, to be exact. Which reminds me how long I haven't met most of my OLP classmates in at least 15months (except T, K & L.) where we had the fail outing dinner at swensons zomg i have no life. -.- Anyway it was fun talking to her - she makes me ROFL (okay not literally, but you get my point) at her funny comments and i think she actually dishes out pretty good advices when it comes to things that I tend to be more ignorant about. I miss the TPoly girls - J, Z, W, but I shall meet them in Aug since they're on holiday for the whole month (according to Z). (:

Someone please organise OLP classouting! :D (Travis Tan I think it's your turn :D)

And my dear Z, NO THAT WAS NOT FATEEEEE, I think it's more of a nightmareeeeeeee I don't wanna relive! I just can't believed I laughed off when I had that dream and it really came true later. :/

Goodmorning peeps, I shall take a nap before deciding what to do for the rest of the day(: YAY POST-MIDS HOLIDAY MOOD HAHAHAHA! :P
Xoxo.